2020 Recap
Another year, another blog post focused on year-end reflection.
Every time I think this blog is finally dead, I revive it with a single post. Perhaps I cannot escape the fundamental need to unwind, recall, and reflect every now and then. I'm glad that I have a tendency to jot down my thoughts, however infrequently, because I can properly assess and track my growth and experiences. Despite having better memory than others, I still find myself surprised at the number of events I've forgotten when reading about them in a previous blog post. Humans truly are quick to forget. In fact, I somewhat regret not blogging a reflection/recap post for 2019. Even so, I doubt anything in 2019 can hold a light next to what 2020 had to offer.
Ah...2020. Where do I start?
A year overshadowed by a global pandemic - the coronavirus aka COVID-19. A year of economic shutdowns, market volatility, political unrest, job instability, and everything turning topsy-turvy from the world we knew at the end of 2019.
Interestingly enough, John and I started the year out pretty normal...optimistic even. I'd say most of the social media world (including podcasters) were highly anticipating 2020 to be the year of new hope and dreams, given it was a the turn of a decade after all. I still vividly recall spending MLK weekend crammed in Ruth's tiny apartment with 30 other folks celebrating her 28th birthday with a very lively party. A couple of weeks later, I hopped onto a cruise for the first time (the Princess Cruise) and had a smashing time with our Sacramento couples' group. And then, news of the virus entering the US hit. The spread was so quick and deadly that only a week after our cruise trip, the government was banning travel. We later learned that the cruise ship we were on was the last cruise ship that didn't have a single case of the coronavirus, and saved ourselves from being quarantined on the boat for 14 days.
What a way to kick start my year of traveling! Or least that was what I had in mind for 2020. Instead, I ended up sheltering in place for the rest of year in my "tiny" condo in Old Town Pasadena. Even so, there were many lessons I've learned throughout the year.
The first thing I learned about myself is that I am not as anti-social as I thought my introverted self should be. I enjoyed working from home and keeping to myself indoors for the first 4 months into the quarantine, but grew restless and lonely quickly after. Mind you, I still love working from home, but I realized that despite my introverted personality, I love socializing with my small circle of friends every now and then...OUTSIDE. *Shock* I quickly realized from this revelation that I also need a backyard in my future/permanent home. A balcony or patio isn't enough to simulate being "outdoor". A nearby park also doesn't make the cut because it's public - anyone who doesn't wear a mask properly or abide by the social distancing regulations stresses me out.
The second thing I learned is that journaling really helps me to clear my mind and readjust my perspective. I favor a mix of bullet and freestyle journaling - a type of journaling that focuses on capturing your thoughts as quickly and raw as possible. I find this type of journaling effective because I don't feel constrained by templates or feeling like a failure if I fail to journal for a day and am forced to see a blank space on my page. I decided that this is a habit I should take with me for the long run.
The remaining learnings of the year I will list them down below in no particular order. I simply want to have them all written down for future reference.
- I learned that I am extremely blessed financially. Sure, I may have dreams of wanting the finest luxuries in life, but I faced no difficulty keeping my job or financing my wants and needs. The transition to working from home did not hinder me nor make my work life any more challenging that it was when I was back at the office. The challenges that my friends who are teachers and essential workers face on day-to-day basis due to the pandemic has shifted my entire perspective on how much I shall not want even in a season of global crisis.
- I learned that I am privileged even though I am from a minority race in the US. The job that I have allows me to have plenty of freedom over my schedule and work-life balance to adjust and adapt to the lifestyle changes the pandemic brought.
- I learned that for as long as I can remember, I prioritize most of my available time to be with family (both personal and church). The moment shelter-in-place went into effect and we could no longer travel or gather, I gained back so many weekends and holidays I would have spent up in the Bay Area with John's family that I didn't know what to do with them. This also made me realize that I don't allocate enough time for myself or my friends. No wonder I don't have very many friends or personal hobbies.
- I learned that even though I've held resentment, regret, and discontentment in my heart from the conflicts and differences John and I face in our marriage in the past years, he is without a doubt the BEST person I could ever ask for to be quarantined with. This quarantine period has reminded me why I fell in love with him, and how his drastic contrast in personality and perspective on life balances out mine perfectly.
- I learned that being a part of community is important to find purpose and meaning in life. When work and church groups stopped gathering, I felt lost and all alone in Pasadena. I couldn't understand why I needed to be there physically, which further emphasized to me how much relationships and connections with others determine and influence most of your life choices.
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